"The Church as a Hospital" - The Early Journey Pt. 2

I have already blogged about how my life became like a Magna Doodle board completely swiped clean. I wrote about the vision I had where God told me very specifically that He had ‘castled’ me. And I’ve even shared some stories of God’s grace, mercy and faithfulness from this side of that ‘castling’ move. What you don’t know yet is exactly how that castling move occurred…

John Wimber, founder of the Vineyard church movement, referred to the church as a school, an army and a hospital. After my world fell apart, I desperately needed it to be a hospital – but it became very clear very early on that the church where I had been, where I had served and where I had been employed, would not be what I needed. There are several details from those early days that are better left undocumented here in this blog, but let’s just say that I realize my choices started the dominos tipping, but the human fall out after the fact nearly killed me. Although well intentioned, things were handled very, very poorly.

In the early weeks that followed the “Magna Doodle Effect”, I was in an uncontrollable downward spiral. The trauma of my losses was so overwhelming that I wanted desperately to escape my pain, my circumstances and even my life. Things were so out of control that I chose spend a week in Ft. Worth, Texas for some intense inner healing prayer ministry and counseling from a wonderful older man named, John. He helped me find some footing.

John ministered to me in profound ways that week. He also reached back to the world I had temporarily escaped in order to find out what I would be returning to, so that he could best prepare me for re-entry. He was not encouraged by what he discovered as the climate back in my home church was not good for me at all. I had been incredibly and horribly misjudged, and the leaders had absolutely no idea what to do with me, or how to handle the situation. It became very apparent very quickly that I would not be able to return to this body nor could I trust the leadership.

An acquaintance of mine who just ‘happened’ to live in Ft. Worth connected with me on Facebook, of all things, while I was in Ft. Worth. She ended up in my hotel room on that Thursday after a very painful ‘healing of memories’ counseling session. She was a Godsend who has been walking with me since. She told me about this church that is very near where I live. She knew from her own experience that it had solid, mature leadership and she encouraged me to check it out.

I returned to Atlanta on Saturday, August 30th. On Sunday, the 31st, I landed at RiverStone Church. The moment I entered the worship center, I felt as if I had finally come home. Everything about it was familiar to me – the feel, the worship, the style, the atmosphere, the values, the focus… but most importantly, the Presence of the Lord was there. The heart of the Father was there. I quickly found that the church that I had been in did not have a corner of the market for God’s presence. God was very much here too!

I went forward after the service had closed to receive prayer from one of their ministry team members named, Lori. As I began to share some of my story with her, a man walked up and interjected himself into the conversation. I was almost offended for I had no idea who he was. He introduced himself as Terry, and as I began to share some of my story with him, he pointed to the wall where the church’s values are prominently displayed. He pointed specifically to the word, “Healing”. He said, “Do you see that word? We mean business here about being a center for healing. If God brings you to us, even if it’s just for a season, please make sure that I know you are here. We have resources and we want to walk with you.” That’s all I was asking for… somebody who would catch me and give me a refuge where I could get my bearings… a place where I could finally begin to heal.

Finally!! A hospital! A place where I could come bleeding and broken, where my wounds would not scare anyone away, where my brokenness would not be condemned and further punished, a place where I could heal. Finally - a place where I would be safe, loved, understood, covered, protected and ultimately fully restored.

I found out shortly after that this man who interrupted was one of the associate pastors who oversees the healing ministry at RiverStone. He had been on his way out of the worship center that morning when God told him to turn around. When he did, he saw me, and came and interjected himself into my conversation as a willing participant in what God was doing that morning. Terry has proven to be a true brother to me. He has been walking this journey with me since that day, and continues to cover and protect me as I heal.

This church gets it. The leadership gets it. I absolutely hate the road that brought me to this place, but I wouldn’t change where I am for anything. Thank You, God, for castling me to RiverStone!